Back in 2016, we gave our ideas for 10 Pokémon based on real life that deserve to exist. That was before the launch of Pokémon Sun & Moon, and Game Freak seems to have ignored every last one of our ideas – even the one about a Pokémon that’s a truck! This must have been a mistake, so we’re offering Game Freak the opportunity to make things right by putting all of the following ideas into the upcoming Pokémon Sword and Shield. No need to thank us, Junichi. These ideas are free.

 Emperor Tamarin

This little guy is known for its similar appearance to German emperor Wilheim II, but unlike Wilheim, the tamarin is actually a good dad. (We’re not historians, but what emperor has ever been a good father?) It’s also adorable (Sorry, Will). There’s even an upcoming game based around the tamarin, although it isn’t of the emperor variety.

The emperor tamarin is a social animal, forming bonds with both other members of its species and even humans, so it might evolve through friendship with its trainer instead of levels. It would be normal-type to start with, but could become grass-type with its evolution. This evolution could take the creature’s beard to the next level, reaching Jeff Cork levels of majesty and growing in pride, becoming tall and bipedal (Also like Jeff Cork).

Wolverine

The wolverine is usually a scavenger, but it can also hunt deer, bison, and moose. Despite its ferocity, however, the creature is relatively small and cute-looking. This is a classic combination for a Pokémon, and we believe it’s one that would work well with a normal/steel-type combination, the second type coming from its long, sharp claws. Its fur is good at resisting frost, so perhaps it could have an ability that resists ice-type moves or the frozen status.

This wolverine Pokémon would be a good option for the beginning of the game, perhaps with one evolution that gives it enlarged claws and teeth. It would have particularly good attack and speed stats, but may be a bit lacking in terms of defense due to its small size.

Kangaroo

Some will say Kangaskhan is Pokémon’s kangaroo equivalent. Those people are wrong. It may have a pouch for carrying its young, a tail, and even “kanga” at the start of its name, but…

Okay, Kangaskhan is Pokémon’s kangaroo equivalent. But, Pokémon has a history of having multiple monsters based on similar species. Think of how many mouse Pokémon there are! A kangaroo Pokémon that matches its source material even more, without the weird dinosaur vibe Kangaskhan was going for, would be distinct enough from Kangaskhan to warrant its own version. Namely, it would be cuter and furrier.

Kangaroos are fast and powerful creatures, even in water, so it would be fitting for this monster to have high speed and access to water moves such as “surf.” They’re also known to be mostly friendly with humans, making them a good potential match for early trainers. Since baby kangaroos are so adorable, that should be the base form, with further evolutions seeing it mature in size and power.

Alpaca

The alpaca is as cute as it is funny. It has short legs, a fat body and a long, upward-reaching neck. It also has myriad methods of communication: humming, snorting, grumbling, clucking, and even screaming. But one of its most notable ways of communicating discomfort is by spitting, either on other alpacas or humans. That’s a lot of potential, not just for character, but also for moves and abilities. There’s already a move called “spit up,” for Arceus’ sake!The alpaca also has over 50 variants of fiber color, so it would be awesome to see different areas of Galar have alpaca-equivalents of different colors, not unlike what Diamond and Pearl did with Shellos. The base evolution could be a cria – a baby alpaca – which is obviously smaller and has less fiber. The next evolution would match the alpaca’s level of poof and give it poison spit. Its final form could make the fiber even more extravagant and give the monster a pompous attitude to match its stylish hairdo.

Mantis Shrimp

The mantis shrimp is a badass. It may seem small and docile, but this little crustacean can fire its club-like organ so fast that it has the same power as a bullet. A single blow from the mantis shrimp’s club can dismember a crab’s leg or crack its shell, split open a human thumb, or even shatter glass. Their punch is so fast that it boils the water around them. On top of that, it can see more colors than practically any other animal on the planet, which humans aren’t even able to imagine.

This is the perfect opportunity for a glass cannon. The mantis shrimp Pokémon would have insane attack and speed stats, but its small size would leave it without much defense. Its ability to see so many colors could translate into potential for learning psychic moves. This would likely be a late-game Pokémon due to its dangerous nature and might be the signature Pokémon of the games’ main villain. 

Snowy Owl

This is one Pokémon we still can’t believe hasn’t been created yet, but with Hedwig’s prominence in the Harry Potter franchise, it’s time to bring the snowy owl to Galar. Fans seem to have the same idea, as the creature served as the inspiration for the fan-game Pokémon Clover’s Whizzard.

Since the only other previous flying/ice Pokémon was Articuno, the snowy owl would be the first easily obtainable Pokémon to have this unique type combination. Its first evolution would of course be a baby owl, but it would be constantly shivering due to its cold environment. When it evolves, it would acclimate to the cold, developing a prideful and detached disposition to match the creature’s majesty.

Dolphin

Why wouldn’t you want a dolphin Pokémon?! They’re adorable, friendly, fast, and intelligent. They could even serve as this generation’s “ride Pokémon,” potentially helping trainers reach Galar’s equivalent of Ireland in the post-game.

We asked for this back in 2016, but Game Freak clearly isn’t getting our calls. So we’ll just have to shout it as loud as we can: GIVE US A DOLPHIN POKÉMON, GAME FREAK!! We don’t care if you have to get rid of some of the old Pokémon to make it happen, it’s worth it!

…Oh. I guess they only heard the second part. Sorry, guys.

Sphinx

Not to be confused with Shinx, the sphinx is a mythical creature with a human head, wings, and the body of a lion. This odd combination of features has nevertheless become prominent not just in mythology, but in popular culture as well. The combination of this creature’s intimidating features yet calm demeanor would make for a fascinating legendary Pokémon.

The sphinx is also known for its riddles, so trainers would have to solve them before being able to challenge it. Once in battle, the sphinx Pokémon would make use of its claws, wings, and psychic abilities to pose a significant challenge.

Gun

No, not the very real game, Pokémon Gun. A gun Pokémon! There’s already a Pokémon based on a sword, and this one would operate in a very similar way. It’s a ghost/ steel Pokémon that’s able to levitate and use itself as a weapon. The Pokémon Company even considered having a gun Pokémon before in Gold and Silver’s leaked beta!

Starting as a small, levitating handgun, the monster would evolve into a frightening and deadly machine gun, with large, angry eyes and its mouth as the barrel, similar to the sentient appliances from The Brave Little Toaster. To head off any criticism, the Pokemon’s projectiles could be beams of energy similar to the blasters from Star Wars, which would also sidestep the messy question of how it gets its ammunition.

Mech

There aren’t many things cooler in video games than mechs. They’re powerful, fast, and overall ridiculously cool-looking. Now imagine having a mech Pokémon that rips Joey’s Rattata to shreds! Pokémon Sword and Shield are already emphasizing increased scale with larger environments and dynamax Pokémon, and a giant mech Pokémon would be right at home with that philosophy. Just imagine a dynamaxed mech!

Like Mewtwo and Porygon, this Pokémon would be man-made, trained to become a monster of mass destruction. But through some series of events, you’re able to catch it and give this mech the love it deserves. Since mechs are so powerful and sturdy, this Pokémon likely wouldn’t be allowed in competitions and would only be obtainable in the post-game, because this big boy would be a force to be reckoned with. Perhaps your trainer could even climb inside it! (Don’t think about that too much)

What are your thoughts on these choices? What animals/ objects/weapons of mass destruction would you put into the wonderful world of Pokémon? What did you have for lunch today? Let us know in the comments below!

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